Yahoo News Gets Something Right

Amazingly Yahoo News has finally published something about the double standards where women are concerned without completely failing. The title of the article on the Yahoo home page is a complete fail, however, and doesn’t match the title of the actual article. I am convinced that the editor who titles their pieces for the main page (and usually makes grammar or spelling errors) is the worst kind of internet troll alive.

So. What did they do right? I had to click on the article that shouted “Cheerleader Muzzled by Team” because it reminded me of learning about scold’s bridles in my Shakespeare class. I thought, what a fucking word choice Yahoo.  Well a young, white cheerleader was apparently accidentally tackled and then tweeted about it. This created fallout and her twitter account was deleted over it. A sports editor “goes to bat” for her, if you will, although in this case I have no idea what the sports analogy would be.

I realize that her being a white cheerleader is helping her case, but I am impressed and I will take small signs of improvement where I can get them. I admire her for declaring how tough she is compared to the man who knocked her over. The writer points out the double-standard with the cheerleaders public image:

The team allows cameras to record cheerleader auditions for a reality show on CMT. It’s alright when the team controls the message but not when a cheerleader begins to get a following and has the stage to herself?

While many commenters decry the grown men’s attitudes of being “like little boys” and needing to grow-up the bigger problem here is ignored. There is a huge imbalance between men and women in this culture. Women are objects to cheer on a team and must perform difficult, grueling routines that require a level of physicality that takes amazing dedication to achieve. They must do this all while barely dressed and knowing that the work they do is not even considered a sport. Cheerleaders are raped and abused and even forced to continue cheering for their rapists. It’s like an amplified microcosm of everything that’s wrong with how our society views women.

Pointing out the double standard is a tiny step, no just one toe, in the right direction.

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Fight Like A Girl – A Personal Post

I can tell you the precise moment that I felt a surge in my heart and a recognition of my own ability to love myself as a woman. In fact, I even cried a little bit. The setting? I was at a small concert visiting a friend on the east coast in 2010. We went to see Emilie Autumn a singer and violinist who is proudly feminist and a self-identified asexual. I had never been to a show like this before. First, it was full of mainly women. Second, only women performed the music. Third, unlike most audiences this audience was the most loving and caring I’d ever been in. There was no crowding or shoving and when someone felt sick someone else who didn’t even know them went to get them water while EA performed. Amazingly people held this girl’s spot for her while she went to get the water and came back.

On stage Emilie Autumn and her back-up dancers perform in a mockery of Victorian virtues in corsets and socks with garters. I know showing the body is  typical for female musicians, but something happened. I looked at these women and the happy females around me and I felt suddenly good about my body in a way I never had before. I didn’t feel like our bodies were on display for men, but as a celebration of each other (as many audience members were also dressed in Victorian style clothes, corsets, etc). I realize that this might be problematic for some, but I will talk about that in an upcoming post. In any case the feeling about my body would be solidified by another event I attended later that year, but that’s a story for another time.

Instead, I will close with the lyrics to the first song off of EA’s next album. Some of her fanbase hate this song. They hate the lyrics and are accusing her of hating men. Sigh. Keep in mind that this song also refers to the end of a book she has written about female inmates in an insane asylum.

Lyrics to the first song on Emilie Autumn’s next album:

My heart is a weapon of war
My voice is my weapon of choice
An eye for an eye,
a heart for a heart,
a soul for a soul.
We fight for the dream,
we fight to the death,
we fight for control.

For there is no such thing as justice,
all the best that we can hope for is revenge:
A hostile takeover,
an absolute rebellion to the end.
This is our battle cry
I’m giving you a head start,
you’re going to need it,
’cause I fight like a girl
I’ll get my revenge on the world or a least 49% of the people in it
And if I wake up with blood on my hands,
well, I know that you’ll understand,
’cause I fight like a girl.

We are under attack
What is the body count? I’ve lost track
If nobody’s mentioned how this will end, then I’ll be the first
there are more of US than there are of YOU, so show me your worst

For there is no such thing as justice,
all the best that we can hope for is revenge:
A hostile takeover,
an absolute rebellion to the end.
This is our battle cry
I’m giving you a head start,
you’re going to need it,
’cause I fight like a girl
I’ll get my revenge on the world or a least 49% of the people in it
And if I wake up with blood on my hands,
well, I know that you’ll understand,
’cause I fight like a girl.

It’s so easy to kill,
this I learned by watching you
If I have to, I will,
it’s not pretty but it’s true
I am through lying still,
just a body to be
beaten, fucked, and if I’m lucky, left for dead,
so WHO’S scary now?

NO MERCY, it’s a bit too late,
we’re following NO RULES, NO CODE, just wait:
‘Cause if we’ve got no honor,
then we’ve got no shame,
if it’s in self-defense,
then we will take no blame

This is our battlecry
even if you’re only a boy,
you can
FIGHT LIKE A GIRL!

‘Cause I fight like a girl,
I’ll get my revenge on the world (or at least 49% of the people in it),
and if I end up with blood on my hands
Well, I know, that you’ll understand,
’cause I fight like a girl.

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Pornography, Dworkin and Listening to Women

“Women would come to me and tell me things that happened to them, ways in which they had been sexually abused that had to do with pornography” Andrea Dworkin

This quote is from this disturbing documentary about pornography (click here). It only has 45 views, but I hope more have seen it than that indicates. Maybe from other links or DVD? I am glad Dworkin discusses the issue of pornography as it relates to black women. I got the link for this from Radical ProFeminist.

To me the most important part of this quote is the first part. I’m not discounting the problem of pornography when I say that. What struck me was that something happened because women came forward and told their stories. We must do this. And when women come to us, we must take seriously what they say. Internalized misogyny tells us to ignore and hate other women. It tells us women are only “seeking attention” as if trying to get attention or help was intrinsically bad. No! That is a symptom of how fucked up our society is: the very length women have to go to be heard or receive attention.

We have to listen to women. Those who are born female and assigned so at birth. Realizing this has changed my life. Nothing is more important.  I do want to address the issue of pornography, but I will do that in a different post.

From the same documentary:

“I like direct action politics. I like confrontational speech. I like being direct….I don’t think we are going to get anywhere by begging men to be nicer to us” Dworkin.

“There are many threats of attack for speaking” Dworkin

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Women’s Shared Experience: The Period, Part 1

I have been thinking a lot about what is true for being a woman and what shapes that experience. Thus I have decided to do a series of posts on the subject. While gender roles are constructed; what is true about being a woman that is not a construct? As little girls we are shaped by the expectation of receiving our periods and then the accompanying shaming attached to the event. I realize that this is not a new concept and has been written about before, but I wanted to share my own views. Basically, I wonder why having a period is something, like so much else for women, that is defined and all about the men.

From the historic record we know that women were often separated from men during the monthly bleeding and determined to be unclean.  The period is a taboo. Many religions restrict what a woman can do during menstruation and forbid women from entering sacred sites during this time.

Women and periods are so closely aligned in people’s minds that most of our experiences are influenced by this cyclical event. We are defined by having a period, irregularity of a period, the absence of a period, the return of a period, controlling a period through chemicals, and then the cessation of the period at menopause. Having a natural process like this would be fine if we didn’t live in a patriarchal culture where having a period inconveniences PIV.  Wikipedia has an alarming section about menstruation:

All female placental mammals have a uterine lining that builds up when the animal is fertile, but is dismantled (menstruated) when the animal is infertile. Some anthropologists have questioned the energy cost of rebuilding the endometrium every fertility cycle. However, anthropologist Beverly Strassmann has proposed that the energy savings of not having to continuously maintain the uterine lining more than offsets energy cost of having to rebuild the lining in the next fertility cycle

Many have questioned the evolution of overt menstruation in humans and related species, speculating on what advantage there could be to losing blood associated with dismantling the endometrium rather than absorbing it, as most mammals do.

Beginning in 1971, some research suggested that menstrual cycles of co-habiting human females became synchronized. A few anthropologists hypothesized that in hunter-gatherer societies, males would go on hunting journeys whilst the females of the tribe were menstruating, (LOL, WTF!) speculating that the females would not have been as receptive to sexual relations while menstruating.

We see that the issue for men is the clear loss of blood that deprives some men of having PIV. (While there is no reason if a woman desires intercourse during that time that she shouldn’t be able to have it). Once again we see how EVERYTHING is framed by PIV. There couldn’t be ANY OTHER possible reason a man might want to be around a woman if he couldn’t get PIV. Never mind the fact that hunting is dictated by the animals being hunted and their habits and availability NOT a woman’s monthly cycle or any other human directed event (damn it, I’ve been a vegetarian for almost ten years and even I know that). Entire tribes moved as a group to follow herding animals to hunt them, for instance, or would travel to spots to fish, etc. Sigh. Science fails when misogyny rules.

As you might guess those questioning a FACT of nature in women are men. The endnotes prove it, one of the men being the laughable asshole that is Desmond Morris. And really this section on Wikipedia about questioning a biological fact  is unnecessary to an understanding of menstruation. Compare that to how Wikipedia phrases the explanation of why external testicles exist:

There are several hypotheses why most boreotherian mammals have external testes which operate best at a temperature that is slightly less than the core body temperature, e.g. that it is stuck with enzymes evolved in a colder temperature due to external testes evolving for different reasons, that the lower temperature of the testes simply is more efficient for sperm production.

See. No questioning. No pointing out how testicles might appeal to a sex partner (because women and our viewpoint of something NEVER matter, and goddess forbid that Wikipedia mention that men like to look at each others junk). Nope. Testicles exist of and for themselves, i.e. the men who own them, while women and our periods are all owned by men.

Since PIV has come up let’s see if it is mentioned on a website supposedly dedicated to women’s health.

Does Sex Help to Manage Period Pains?
Many women find that sexual intercourse actually helps to relieve period pains and menstrual cramps. This is because an orgasm can cause your uterus to contract, enabling it to use up excess prostaglandins in the process. Prostaglandins are hormones produced by your uterine lining. They help to stimulate contractions that move menstrual blood out of the uterus, and are also responsible for those cramps that occur throughout your period.

Notice sex = PIV. Yes and PIV is the only possible way to orgasm during menstruation. To be fair the site does briefly mention oral sex, but seems to dissuade readers from doing this. The focus is completely on heterosexual relationships.

How do You Avoid Making a Mess When Having Sex During Your Period?
Women and men often dislike having sex during menstruation because of the mess that it can cause. However, with a little careful planning you can keep the mess contained and focus on enjoying the experience.

I could LOL forever at this one.Don’t forget about the men!!

Guess what is not mentioned at all on this site to relieve period pain? MASTURBATION. Yep, that’s right. Sigh. I wish all women were taught how to masturbate if they don’t discover it for themselves.

Since I mentioned masturbation I’ll close by saying that I am only TOUCHING the surface of cultural beliefs about periods and I will continue exploring this further in another post. A little digital humour for you (oh see, double meaning there too, lol).

 

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